Community Events

False Alarm, Everybody!

When: Sat., Dec. 22 2012

Well. This is awkward, isn’t it? So the world didn’t end in flames yesterday, and you probably should have thought twice about placing your fate into the hands of a long-dead civilization’s calendar before threatening to annex your neighbors’ homes for your new post-apocalyptic fiefdom. Listen — it’s not your fault you didn’t realize that the “galactic alignment” happens every winter solstice, or that John Cusack movies and dudes on DMT aren’t the most reliable sources for your end-of-the-world factoids. But now’s not the time to split hairs over the inauspicious beginning to the 14th b’ak’tun — now’s the time to remove the boards from your windows and start apologizing for attempting to start your own version of Hunger Games in Sevier Park. Do you think Hallmark makes apocalypse-themed apology cards? Because we’re going to need a lot of them.

Lance Conzett

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