Great Moments in the Opposition of Sharia Law

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Today, Murfreesboro ... tomorrow, the Tri-State Area!
  • "Today, Murfreesboro ... tomorrow, the Tri-State Area!"
I'll admit that I kind of feel bad for the opponents of the construction of the Murfreesboro mosque. I feel bad for them like I feel bad for all folks who fervently believe in conspiracy theories. Hell, I believe that the Democrats are intentionally throwing the election for the Republicans, so I know a thing or two about wanting desperately to believe in something that makes life a little more exciting and makes you feel like you're tapped into the real truth that most people are too busy or stupid to realize.

Alas, the task the mosque opponents have set before them is enormous. They need to somehow prove that Muslim Tennesseans are less boring and ordinary than any other group of religious Tennesseans and that they, unlike every other religious group in the state, are not prone to fractures and disagreements and differences in opinion; instead, they all march in evil, nefarious lock-step.

Just to put this in more familiar terms, imagine, if you will, that someone wanted to impose Christian law on the citizens of Tennessee — something completely ridiculous like, say, oh, I don't know, denying everyone in the state the ability to buy beer before noon on Sundays, whether or not they were Christian. Oh, I know, it's hard to even imagine.

But what if we polled people, Christians specifically, about whether or not they supported this "Christian law"? You'd find that most Christians, regardless of particular strain, probably think it's stupid. Some don't mind it because it just seems right. Priests probably think it's stupid, as do some mainline ministers. And other ministers would like it because it shows respect for their beliefs. Only a small, small group of ministers would be all, "Dang straight you can't buy beer on a Sunday morning, because we said so! We even influence the secular law. Woo hoo! We are so powerful, all must bend to our Christian will!"

In other words, you'd have a bunch of different opinions on the matter, because there are a bunch of different Christian sects and ideas and opinions, and only a very small subset really wants to force their ways on others.

You'll be unsurprised to learn that it's the same with Islam — with that many people belonging to a religion (22 percent of the world's population), there's a lot of variation in Muslim belief.

So, when you say "Sharia law," you kind of need to specify whose version and whether the Muslims in Murfreesboro have much to do with the people whose version you fear. You might need an expert witness to explain to the court about Sharia law — someone like, say, Frank Gaffney:

Plaintiffs called former Deputy Assistant Secretary of Defense under President Ronald Reagan, Frank Gaffney, to the stand and asked the court to enter him as an expert on Sharia Law.

"I don't hold myself out as an expert on Sharia Law," Gaffney told the court on the witness stand. "But I have talked a lot about that as a threat."

Oops. Their expert's not an expert. That's too bad. They could use one.

Anyway, we have, in Tennessee, Muslims from all over. The idea that somehow they could defy human nature and get along well enough, despite their backgrounds and different traditions, to come to a consensus on what would constitute "Sharia law" and then, for some reason, take over Murfreesboro is highly unlikely.

And, yeah, sure, Mufreesboro is nice and all, but what, exactly, do the anti-mosque folks think Muslims would want with it? Even if they were going to try to take over the country, why would they do it from Murfreesboro? Have you ever driven I-24 at rush hour? I'm pretty sure any invasions launched from Murfreesboro by roadway are going to be thwarted by traffic.

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