Spaceship Bredesen Flies to the Neutral Planet: 'All I Know Is My Gut Says Maybe'

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By courageously declining to decide if he's against blowing the tops off mountains or allowing guns into city playgrounds, saloons or state parks, our governor has made a comfortable new home for himself on the Neutral Planet.

If you are unfamiliar with the Neutral People who inhabit this world, click here. A brief summary:

The Neutral People are humanoids of average height and build. They are hairless, their skin is a dull grey, and their faces are not capable of displaying emotions. In fact, it's not entirely clear if they have emotions at all. They have a very detached outlook on life.

The highest danger alert they have on their planet is a beige alert. Every color on their planet is a muted or neutral tone, such as grey, beige, and tan. Their motto is "Live free, or don't."

Famous Quotes from Neutral People:

* Neutral President: I have no strong feelings one way or the other.
* Neutral President: All I know is my gut says maybe.
* Neutral President: If I don't survive, tell my wife, "Hello."
* The President's Aide: Sir, we're on beige alert.

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