by Adam Gold
But what if that not-necessarily-terrible-and-contemptible person is second-rate-Five for Fighting-meets-third-rate-John Mayer collegiate middling road-warrior Gavin DeGraw? Then should he have to pay dearly for it? And what if DeGraw's smirking just-farted-in-front-of-own-girlfriend-in-public mug (above) is among the most theoretically punchable in rock? Should it be punched in reality?
While, honestly, I say no, a group of at-press-time unidentified New York City thugs have answered those questions with a resounding yes.
Said ostensibly taste-avenging (but probably not) ruffians left DeGraw with a broken nose, black left eye, black right eye, concussion and cuts and bruises following a late-night blanket party on the streets of Manhattan last Sunday. Well, actually, the singer may have sustained some of those injuries from the impact of the taxi cab that struck him as he was making his post-altercation city stumble, bringing a whole new debate over karma into the mix here. (I kid, I kid.)
What does this have to do with Nashville, you ask?
Well, while DeGraw has since been released from Bellevue (the hospital, not Middle Tennessee retail graveyard) to lick his wounds at home, the incident has forced the singer to bow out of his scheduled supporting slots on the next eight shows of Train and Maroon 5's current Monsters of MOR Tour. (No, that's not really the name of the tour.)
That includes Wednesday night's stop at our own Bridgestone Arena, according to a press release received by the Scene. New Orleans neo-soul prodigy PJ Morton will assume DeGraw's slot on the undercard.
Now the real question: Does anybody care? Should it have been a member of Train instead?
Because I do. Not as a cynical, acerbic music critic, but, you know, as a human being. So, switching hats, I'd like to go ahead and sincerely wish DeGraw a full and speedy recovery.