by Adam Gold
If ever there was an epic time and place to people-watch, it was Lady Gaga’s monster gala at Bridgestone Arena a few weeks back — also known as "the night I saw the most gut-bustingly abominable band since Limp Bizkit: Semi Precious Weapons."
Anyway, never ones to miss an opportunity, You Tell Concerts' Chrystal — our favorite DIY field reporter of crowd-sourced concert reviews — and her cohort Colleen were on hand to catch and capture some amusing in-the-moment musings from the monster mash. Brace yourself for perhaps the single best moment in YTC history — an enthused fan's description of The Monster Ball, saying, “It’s as if someone was to rape you with the most gentle fire imaginable. And it is rape. Really. … A lot of rape.” Hats off. What a fuckin’ show-stopper. It’s the “Ey’d juhmp his bohhnes” of 2011. I also really like, “She’s a crazy BEHHHTCH! … And she’s so inspirational.”
See all that and more above.