by Adam Gold
Even though tonight’s Road to Bonnaroo showdown has yet to even commence, boisterous “Texan” roustabout and mercenary Dozen Dimes “manager” Tex Rambunctious has issued an apology for the inflammatory smear campaign and Rove-esque gerrymandering tactics he's used to secure victory for his clients. If we are to take Mr. Rambunctious at his, or anyone else’s, word — which we shouldn’t — then we can safely assume that the Dimes RTB conquest is a foregone conclusion. At a press conference, held at an unknown time and date outside the Mercy Lounge, Rambunctious read a prepared statement, “written by someone else,” in which he said:
…It was wrong of me to admit to rigging the contest. It was wrong of me to use blackmail against [Mercy Lounge talent buyer John Bruton] to insure my band, The Dozen Dimes, although vastly superior to the other bands on the bill … would win [the contest].
Rambunctious’ goes on to take sole responsibility for his harangues and trickery claiming, “I acted alone … those sweet, little, precious goldmines — The Dozen Dimes — had nothing to do with this,” before characterizing the band’s RTB competition as “commie assholes.”
In a comment posted earlier today on this here blog, RTB contestant Caitlin Rose said Rambunctious’ has a “filthy fucking mouth.”
Both Rose and The Dozen Dimes compete against Majestico, AutoVaughn, The Effects, The Nobility, Mikky Ekko and The Deadstring Brothers, at the Road to Bonnaroo 8 off 8th, tonight at Mercy Lounge. The battle begins at 9 p.m. As always, it’s free.