How The Rich Stole Christmas: J.R. to Grand Marshal Nashville Christmas Parade

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What exactly is a grand marshal? Well, when it comes to parades, a grand marshal is a ceremonial dignitary. More than anything, it's a figurehead sort of role filled by a person of high esteem--no real responsibilities other than lookin' cool, being respected and showing up on time. Last year, the Nashville Christmas Parade's grand marshal was some dude from American Idol. Pretty nice, right? Well, apparently this year Music City will really be classing it up a touch. From John Rich's Twitter [sic]:

Dec4th!!!! Guess who's gonna be the GRAND MARSHALL for the Nashville Christmas Parade???? ME!!! Hahaa! Hope to see ya'll there! Hohoho!

Wow. He really didn't even give us time to guess. That's probably for the best, because, personally, I likely would've guessed someone like Phil Bredesen or Eddie George. You know, not someone who gets kicked out of Café Coco for late-night douchery or someone who allegedly smacks uninvited guests upside the head like one of the raging pubescent harpies on My Super Sweet 16. Oh, and if you don't already follow Rich's Twitter, do it. Otherwise, you'll miss out on gems like this one. Though such amazing updates might slow down now that Rich Daddy is breeding. Word on the street is that he's naming the kid Cash. Seriously.

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