Private Lives of Nashville Wives Recap: 'Fun Sponge'

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Private Lives of Nashville Wives has now transmitted two episodes over our American airwaves. We learned a little more about the women this time: Erika is fine. Cassie is fine. Sarah is fine. Betty might be fine-ish. Jenny is terrible. Ana is the absolute worst.

You know what's the best? Law & Order marathons. TNT should look into that.

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Cassie had no idea Erika was "so freaky" with her holiday party favors sexy roleplay.

Later, Cassie says "Isn't it crazy? The roller coaster? We go through?" That's about what it's like to have musicians for husbands.

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Sarah gives us an inside look at touring life. "It's always scary going into a new venue we've never played before." Hm, indeed.

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Here are some bags of breast milk, delivered to Cassie and Gary by the birth mother of their newly adopted baby.

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"Well, thanks for stopping by..." they say to the birth mother.

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Sarah claims she just put on her seatbelt.

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Erika being "complimented" on her "exotic" look which consists of, I guess, having a natural hair color.

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Picking up the twins for a night out. It's like taking a bunch of acid and watching Sex and the City.

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A disdainful look over the Girls' Night Out.

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This person is called Tina Brady. "She's known as 'The Queen of Bling,'" they say.

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Meet Ana, the worst person at the music festival.

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"How can this woman not have a man?"

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This fellow is at Sarah's show.

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Elegance.

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