Domino's American Legends: Someone Else Tried Them So I Don't Have To



Once upon a time, I used to be susceptible to any new pizza promotion. Who wouldn't want a little novelty where chain pizza is concerned? Bring it p'zon, I thought. Ironically, it was the Pizza Hut P'zone that ended the infatuation. Heavy, greasy, soggy--served me right for being disloyal to Pizza Perfect and Manny's.

Since then, the siren songs of the Brooklyn and (ugh) the Pasta Bowl have fallen upon plugged ears at Casa de Pink. (Especially the Pasta Bowl, which looks like something I wouldn't feed to Garfield. Or maybe I would.) But the TV ads for Domino's American Legends specialty pizzas have touched something in my lizard brain.

Sure, I can snicker all day long at commercials that show "locals" willing to pimp Domino's version of their regional delicacy on camera for 30 pieces of pepperoni. But there's a voice in the back of my head that purrs: Cheesesteak on a pizza? A spicy Hawaiian with jalapenos and pineapple? Just one couldn't hurrrrrtttt....

While angels and devils tweet each other on my shoulder, AOL Food has actually tried all seven American Legends pizzas. I'm not sure I trust their panel of "staffers native to or familiar with each cuisine" when their first Philly rep admits to not liking onion on a cheesesteak. But their taste test turned up two must-tries (the Honolulu Hawaiian and the vaguely Memphian BBQ Chicken, even if commenters rip the latter a new cloaca), two duds (the Buffalo Chicken and the Pacific Veggie), and much in between.

Will I get one? Probably not. It's hard enough to get good meat around here on an actual cheesesteak, let alone somebody's chain-pizza facsimile. But in the interest of culinary diversity in all its American splendor, I pass along the info. Bites cannot survive on localvore cuisine, fine wines and beets alone. Not until somebody starts delivering them in 30 minutes or less.

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