Awright, listen up, E.J., I've got a picture. A big picture. Not one of these things you can watch on one of those, whaddayacallems? iPhones. I'm talking Gone With the Wind, Lawrence of Arabia, Doctor Zhivago. I'm talking Golden Age, razzle-dazzle, limos and klieg lights at the premiere — real red-carpet stuff. I'm telling ya now, you better get the tux out of mothballs. 'Cause baby, we've got a date with a little gold bald guy.

How's it open? It's night. Nashville. A city. A small city — but one that's gotten big. Big! They're using cranes to put cranes on top of cranes. Everything's changing, new folks are moving in. Terrifying, right — just like when sound came in. But somehow, it's still kinda the same place! The cool new stuff fits in with the old, the people and places who made everybody want to come there! New food, new music, new stores; new neighborhoods, new people in charge, fighting some of the same old problems. But they're proud of what's there and where they've come from. They don't want to forget who they are.

So this rag called the Nashville Scene, it makes a big list, see? Everything they love about this place they call home. They get readers to vote for their favorite things in all kinds of categories. It's like the Oscars, only it's not fixed. Of course, the writers gotta have their say too — you know writers. But when you put it all together ... there's A-list talent in every frame! I'm telling ya, E.J., IMAX doesn't do this justice!

You wanna see it? Of course you wanna see it! Everybody wants to see it! We've got it cued right up for you — every word, every frame, every glorious detail. All you have to do is turn the page.

Know what, E.J.? I think this is going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Lead illustration and Media and Politics illustration: Rachel Briggs
Food and Drink illustration: James W. Elston
Arts, Music and Culture illustration: Adam Baker