Dijon Vu — I've Heard That One Before

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But of course.
  • "But of course."
This past weekend, I was on Commerce Street leaving downtown after a night out that ended at Fleet Street Pub in Printer’s Alley. When I pulled up to the stoplight, a couple of guys shouted out the window:

“Pardon me!”

I dutifully buzzed down the window. It never fails that a tourist stops me to ask directions when I’m downtown.

“What’s up?”

“Do you have any Grey Poupon?”

Uh. [insert missed beat.] “Ha! Not with me, but I do at home! But, of course!”

All right, guys, you got me. It’s been years since I’ve heard that one. Of course I have Grey Poupon dijon mustard. It’s great in salad dressings and marinades. Oh, and on sandwiches. Of course.

But I also have a lot of other mustards. While I only have one kind of mayonnaise, I can’t live with just one mustard. Here’s what I’ve got (in addition to the Grey Poupon):

French’s classic yellow mustard. I mostly use it in egg salad, but Mr. Eats uses it on his corn dogs, not dogs, and sandwiches.

French’s spicy brown mustard. This is my preferred mustard for corn dogs, not dogs, and sandwiches. I’ll use yellow if I need to, but I prefer brown. I like Gulden's, too.

Chinese-style hot mustard. Not only do I use it for dipping spring rolls, I often use it in place of other mustards—particularly in salad dressings—when I want an extra kick. I am not really a fan of spicy, hot foods, but this mustard is the exception.

Trader Joe’s whole grain dijon mustard. For the occasional soft pretzel roll. And just whenever I feel like it.

Additionally, I have dry mustard and pickled mustard seeds for various uses. A number of recipes call for dry mustard and a dollop of pickled mustard seeds is a great topping for just about anything, but particularly for a deviled egg.

What I don’t have is honey mustard or Bavarian mustard. Not that I dislike them; I’ve just run out of room. That's a lot of mustard.

Does my list pass ... [wait for it] muster? What am I missing as a mustard connoisseur?

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